Christmas, Vampires, Love, Trust and Fire...(odd, I know)

I have officially begun putting my Christmas tree up. Tan, I know that you are beating your chest saying, "Noooooo". Sorry!! Hey, at least it can be a spectacle and all the people can drive by slowly and say, look at those people that have their tree up...what kind of people are they??? I could dress my kids in elve's costumes and send then out to play in the front yard...Hmmmm...Don't worry, I won't! Hee hee. I have only put up the tree and the lights...no official decorations, yet. I wanted Tim to have some time to adjust to the whole thing (he usually enforces the "no tree until after nov 11" rule) Why have I done this, you ask? Because it makes me happy-and that is good enough for me. I have been listening to the Christmas production and it is so so good-I just love it...and not being involved this year in choir/music,has made me very sad-so up my tree went. It has helped! Now about that Christmas house banner that Blaine promises every year...

Tim and I are going to Dracula (the ballet) this weekend. I am very excited about it. First we are going to the Keg for supper as we love it and have not been there in quite some time. Then we will proceed to the ballet. It is going to be such a great night...I feel all "high-class" or something...first having dinner and then going to the ballet. We haven't been on a grand-scale date for quite some time, so I can hardly wait! On the topic of Tim, I just wanted to say what a wonderful guy he is. You know, I don't know many humans like him on this earth. People are usually so non merciful and fickle in their love. He has truly shown me Jesus over the last few months. He has even been reading Captivating to better understand women and how to deal with and treat me and also Gracie, his little girl. He truly adores us...not just loves and puts up with, but adores his family. Everyday he tells me how beautiful he thinks I am. Even when I feel like the butt area has gotten a little larger, he says I am perfect and when I look at him, I know he isn't just saying that cause that is what guys should say. He actually told me the other day that I am captivating. Me? I said (I can hardly believe him) Almost daily, he tells me how much he appreciates everything I do around the house and always thanks me for dinner. Sometimes when I look into his eyes I can see how Jesus feels about me. He looks past my outer appearance, through my faults and sin, and sees the woman I was created to be. Those are very overwhelming moments (that I usually run from and joke about...I get all squirmy with that kind of unspoken intimacy) So, now that most of you are barffing, I will quit. I just wanted you to know what an amazing man I am married to. I love him! Plus, as an added bonus, he has great hair!

Anyway, the main theme of what God has been teaching me about lately is trust. I saw a picture today of a little girl on a swing. You know how fun and carefree you feel on a swing, almost like you are transported back to a time of no cares....it's just you, the swing and the blue sky that you can almost touch! Kristy-Anne, I know you know what I am talking about! As I felt flooded with all of those emotions, my eyes moved up the picture and saw that the swing wasn't hooked to the swing-set, but the chains were held in the hands of Jesus. It said, "do you trust me?" I actually said out loud, "yes". I believe that I won't fall off the cliff. I believe that God has all of my days numbered and that He has a plan for me. This is a place that I have not been in 20 years. I have always felt as though I was on God's List of Things to Do and He just hadn't quite gotten to me yet. I know that He loves me. Just 3 weeks ago we were sitting in church and I told God that I feel useless, just a shell of a person...that I have no purpose. Eldon had us all hold hands and pray for eachother. I was trying, but really wondering if He heard my prayers. At the end Tracy (she was sitting next to me) was talking to the woman beside her and that woman told her to tell the "young girl" (me) that she really felt God was telling her that He has purpose and a plan for me. Hmmmm...that hit me like a tonne of bricks cause I didn't think that God had heard me and if He did, dismissed me cause what I felt was silly and childish. But no, He cared enough to tell someone so that they could tell me. On the same note, thanks Jenny for reminding me of what Steve Osmond said that day 4 years ago...I had forgotten...

So, the sky in more blue, I welcome the snow and I love everyone around me...I will apologize now if I go around hugging you all....just put up with it...besides, who can't use a hug?? What does all of this mean to me? Well, it means I am more peaceful, more content and I have the slight flickerings of joy in my spirit...embers, really...but the Holy Spirit is fanning them and I know that embers are all you need to start a raging fire...

Let's Pick My Brain...Shall We?

These are the goings on in my brain these days (I won't even begin to apologize for all of the things I am going to write about and how they don't seem to relate in the slightest)

First of all...happy belated Birthday, Rylan! Hope you had a good one...if not, your friends had better make this weekend a great one...some wine, perhaps? Secondly, girls-it is time to plan a girls night out or a poker night. My brother in law has a great professional poker set so we would feel all like we were really in Vegas! And, as a bonus, I could make the snacks!! Leave a comment telling me good nights and what you might like to do and we can go from there. It shall be fun times, girls, fun times! Thirdly, work has really started to take up a lot of my brain power and energy...seriously, if you can believe it, most Friday nights, I just want to fall into bed. Yes, it is true..."Social Jenn" has taken a break!! I know that the rest of you have been working for years now, but I haven't ever really worked outside of my home...but I do a whole lot of work in my home therefore I feel like I work and then leave and go to work and then come home and fall into bed...Sad, I know....

You know, it seems as though I have been facing quite a bit of stuff "head-on" lately...like I mentioned my 'therapist' and working through a crap load of crap...Eloquent language, I know...then there are things that I would like to avoid and run from and it seems like every time I go to do that, they are thrown in my face...sometimes it seems like such a small world and I like to ask God why He likes letting all of these things come at once...to which He seems to say "If things happened one at a time and orderly, then you would think that you can handle them, Jenn...therefore you get everything at once so that you have to lean on me for support"...thanks, I think! My therapist asked me a question this week to which I have really been struggling to find the answer. She asked me if I trust that God has his arms around me so that I won't fall over the "cliff". I am not sure. I have always felt like I have been at the bottom of God's "To Do" list and He just hasn't quite gotten to me yet. I know that is not the case...but is the way I feel sometimes...

Anyway, one of these days I am going to write my first of many Christmas rants. I love it so much...all the colors, smells, food and friends...oooo, I cannot wait!!

With working so much, I miss seeing some of you...
Love ya,
J

Ode to Kristy-Anne

K, seriously...this girl had me in tears on Sunday night whilst we were playing Taboo. I was on no particular team, but in my heart I was on her team...I believe it was called "The Cool Team"...or as Jeanson called it, the "I'll Stab you Team"?? Anyway, Kristy-Anne had Nate and I laughing hysterically and I was seriously in tears! (And one must never forget about the hysterical Rylan Schultz...I must dedicate a blog to him one of these days). What a tonne of fun that was...thanks so much for inviting me to your parent's abode. I personally cannot believe that we were all there until 2:45.

You, Kristy-Anne are a truly beautiful girl inside and out. Actually, you and Alison are the women I think of when I read about the woman I want to be like in "Captivating". And no, I am not trying to get out of you posting those absolutely hideous pictures that were taken Sunday night! Honestly, it was like I was able to look ugly in every single one...and yes, to answer the question raging within each one of you...I am vain and I hate ugly pictures. Hey, at least I'm honest, right?? Love ya and hope to do coffee at "St. R. Bucks" when Tim and I visit Edmonton!!

Thanksgiving Weekend

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend! We did got o bed early Friday night as this working thing had me tired out by then (hard to believe, I know!) We enjoyed company every night thereafter and had a wonderful time with them all. On Monday, I made a 17 lb turkey...ya, that's right we have turkey leftovers to hold us over until Christmas!! We had yams (with brown sugar and marshmallows on top), mashed po-tay-toes (I sang the song as I made them, Alison...hee hee), dressing, corn and gravy. It was so yummy...and the best part of it was sharing it with our good friends Maury and Marla. They were the next best thing to having family come and honestly, probably a tad more fun (sorry family!) They stayed until 10 pm and then had to drive back to Calgary...goof balls. Now let me tell you why you all need to have friends like these two. They are open and honest, caring, loving and slightly crazy. They seriously will sit down and without having to talk for 2 hours tell you what their struggles are and help you through yours. They love unconditionally and for that, Tim and I are forever greatful. The thing is...they live in Calgary. Thank goodness for phones and the internet! One of the neatest things they did last time they were here in September was go through our house with us and pray over every room...there definitely has been blessing in our home and our friendship after that. On top of all of those wonderful things, as an added bonus, really, they are quite good lookin' people, as you can see below! We love you guys and cannot wait to visit you!

So, I too have been reading this book Captivating and I just think it is a book that every girl, husband and daddy should read. I have so many thoughts on this book and it's content that I will have to think it over before I write exactly how it has impacted me. It has truly challenged me, infact quite often I read some and then put it down and walk away (cause I feel mad at it because it is challenging me) only to pick it back up 20 minutes later. I am sure that Tim wonders what my deal is. Oh well...he knew I was slightly nuts when he married me!

Now, not to kill the excitement of the big baby announcement (Alison and Leon's) I was just wondering....what does this do to our "Girl's Lounging on the Beach Vacation"??? Just wondering...

Happy Birthday

Today is my sister, Dawn's, birthday...therefore my blog will be dedicated to her. Dawn is almost 5 years younger than me and pretty much opposite from me in every way. She has dark hair, skin and these amazing dark eyes that almost shine purple at times. She loves deeply, but does have a temper...so do not tick her off! Infact, she was so upset with one of my friends once that she phoned them to give them a piece of her mind, but hung up at the last minute!! Crazy girl! Her and Ethan may be the most kindred spirits that have ever existed. She loves my kids (spoils them too much!) and I can only imagine what an amazing mom she will be one day. She is beautiful and is on her way to learning how to work hard...she is pretty young, you know...plus she had me always doing her work for her...right, Dawn? Love you and hope that today is wonderful and that dad makes you a yummy supper and that you take one night off of "South Beach" to enjoy! See you soon...

Jenn